so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
