Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
