and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
