i permit you to call me
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
