If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
