My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
