Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
