she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
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