I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I'm gonna fight the coyote
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
