Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
