he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
what day is it and did you see me today?
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
