you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
