just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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