Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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