i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Randomize
