Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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