Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
And then he peed in my hair
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
