He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Randomize
