weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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