Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
