I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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