Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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