Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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