try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
it was like eating out sand paper
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
