i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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