UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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