still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
