all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
