do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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