he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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