So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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