the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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