I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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