I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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