when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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