god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
How external is "for external use only"?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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