i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
