I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Randomize
