Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
