so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
