We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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