She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
