a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
