everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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