Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
