Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
