ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
