she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
