FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
