My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
